Smart but Scattered Teens

[guessing at the star rating / mining my old FB notes now that they are almost impossible to find]

ok, i didn't read this for pleasure - i needed some help with my scatterbrained 11 yo. and i found alot of good info here. there's a breakdown of 'executive skills' and a quiz for dif aged children and one even for the adults.

it's true you need to know your own strengths and weaknesses before you can help your children - where you can model it, where you'll need external help, and where your hot buttons are (skills you are great at and your child is missing almost entirely!) being aware of it is probably half the battle.

i've implemented some of the checklists and flowcharts they list throughout the book and they have been helpful.

so here's a few good tips:

breakdown tasks like cleaning a room into many small steps - that way it's itemized and feels easier to manage. plus the child knows when the job is done. b/c cleaning your room can feel like such an open ended task.

take a photo of hard to keep organized spots when they are clean and neat. post the photo nearby and when asking the child to tidy up, they can refer to the photo when dealing that area (i'm going to do that with the casette / books-on-tape / magazine shelf unit)

before you complain of a behavior, actually quantify it: take note of how often & when. make a chart or a graph and present your evidence. make a plan to modofy the behaviour and then keep track again. you'll be able to see if the behavior is improving without bringing the bias of frustration into it.

youngest now has a picture flowchart of his morning routine where he checks off the steps. i've stopped nagging hurry,hurry, and now say: "Where are you in your flowchart?" when he is lolly-gagging between tasks. each reminder is noted on the flowchart where it can be skewed toward a +ve or -ve consequence (my choice, decided in advance)